12/19/16

Why Are STAX Headphones Ugly as Sin?

First of all, calling someone or something ugly isn't nice. Just because STAX headphones look like mini air conditioners doesn't mean they're cool. They are fire; hot items only pure audiophiles can love. What are pure audiophiles, you say? A pure audiophile to a regular audiophile is what purified water is to spring water. Different but similar. Still audiophiles; still water.

this stax headphone isn't ugly lol

There have been rumors surrounding the odd look of STAX headphones. Some say it serves as a purification process among the purest of audiophiles. While some say that STAX headphones are actually alien transmitters. Scientists from Jesus' time made a study of audio transmissions from small, block-shaped objects. What they found out will shock you!

According to their study, farmers heard weird audio signals coming from an unidentified device in an abandoned barn. This device looked like the rare photo below, and was later identified as Xtreme Alien Tube Sound (XATS). XATS used an ancient alien technology that transmitted audio signals from our world to theirs. It's still a mystery how XATS came to Earth, or who brought it here. Because people from the A.D. era had other things to do, their interest in XATS gradually died down.

xats

It's still debatable whether STAX headphones are actually XATS in our modern age. Personally, I don't believe it. STAX headphones don't look modern enough. Why would they make something conspicuously odd if they want to stay unidentified? Because they want to avoid looking futuristic, and would rather look ancient and spooky to hide their advanced technology? That could explain why they sound heavenly with a steep price; alien technology is expensive! Frankly, I'm starting to see the light, but will always give STAX the benefit of the doubt. Lastly, STAX headphones aren't ugly, just misunderstood.

Image credit: Lennox, Audio Climax  Co.

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